Unseasoned: Ben Shortledge

What happens when an outdoor dream job is no longer your dream?

Welcome to the April Unseasoned interview!

Unseasoned is a series interviewing folks who leave behind outdoor seasonal gigs for 9-5s, entrepreneurship, or other year-round work. You can read more about the premise here.

This month we welcome Ben Shortledge, an experienced wilderness river guide and river manager turned homemaker and father of two. 

Ben uses his skills developed guiding to care take his two sons, manage a household, and create healthy, nourishing meals for his family. He might even have a few tricks up his sleeve to help you convince your kids to actually eat those healthy meals… if you ask.

As always, I’d love to hear what you thought of this interview and if you are a homemaker, if Ben’s experiences are similar or different from your own. Either reply here or find me on IG: @emeraldlafortune

-Emerald

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THE INTERVIEW

Name: Ben Shortledge

Location: Driggs, ID

Current Job Title: Homemaker

“I really never dreamed that I would do this or even have kids, let alone be their primary caregiver. But now that I'm in that position and have been living it, I would say that it is sort of my dream job.”

EMERALD: Tell me about a great “day in the life” in one of your past outdoor seasonal roles.

BEN: I think it was maybe my fourth year of guiding or so. And my mom had been coming out and doing a trip with me seasonally. She'd convinced my dad to finally come out on a trip. We were on the last day of a Lodore trip and it was costume night. Everybody was dressed up, like we'd raided a thrift store, and he was dressed in a pink, floral dress with a bonnet on.

I remember him giving me a hug and telling me he was proud of me. It's something he had said before. He would tell me he loved me, but there was something about the way he said it that day. I could tell he could see how special the job was to all the people in that group. He could see how happy all of the other people there were and how happy the kids were. He could see that I was happy and that I worked with other special people. There was something about that, it just meant a lot to me. 

That type of day in general… we did a lot of family trips there. I’d see that same look in the eye of parents that I know now as a parent myself, seeing their kids full of joy and experiencing something that they never thought they would experience and was out of their comfort zone. 

Bringing that joy to people, that was a day in the life for me in guiding.

EMERALD: What was the hardest part of outdoor seasonal work for you?

BEN: The hardest part was probably not getting tired, staying enthusiastic, and keeping my energy up throughout the season and then throughout my career. This goes both ways with the question because I imagine if I’d had a year round guiding job, I think that'd be a really hard thing to do. It would've been really hard to keep up that enthusiasm that was necessary to feel like I was doing a good job. Then as my career moved on, I knew it was the end when I was losing that energy and enthusiasm. I knew then that it was time for me to move on to other things.

EMERALD: What were you most worried about when leaving seasonal work? Did those fears actualize?

BEN: I was most worried about how I defined myself to myself. I had eased out of guiding, doing less and less trips over a couple of years. And so I felt like I was able to define myself to others in other ways, not necessarily just as a river guide. But personally, I had guided for long enough and I'd grown up as a guide and I identified as a guide. I was afraid to let go of that. I didn't know what else I was going to identify as. 

In the end, it did take time to find other identities, but it wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be. I realized I didn't have to leave that identity. It is still part of me to this day.  There are so many skills, knowledge bases, friends, and relationships that I took with me. I shouldn't have been as afraid of leaving guiding as I was.

EMERALD: How did you end up in your current role?

BEN: It seems like a long story! Like everything else in my life, it just happened. Which seems like a silly thing to say since my current role is a homemaker for two children. Children I guess do just kind of happen for some people! But for us, I wouldn't say that they were accidents. We planned on having them, we wanted to have them. But I was never a person who would've said that I wanted kids. My wife was like that too.  I thought that if things went in a certain direction, I might have kids. And that's just sort of where we ended up in our thirties. Our lives were in a good place and we thought if we didn't have kids we might regret it someday.

Since my wife was a lawyer at the time, a partner in a law firm, it made sense that I would be the caregiver. She made a comfortable living and could support us, and it was possible for me to be a homemaker. That was something that we really wanted to try to do as a team. So I stepped into that role and… so far so good!

"Most people when they meet a guide, it's obvious that guides are achieving individuals who will work hard at something. So don't underestimate the skills you’ve acquired."

EMERALD: How would you define or describe the role of homemaker? 

BEN: It evolves as children get older. For me, it's care giving mostly of kids, especially when they're younger and you’re literally just watching over them. It’s also meal prep and housework and those things. I put a lot of emphasis on food myself. I can't say that I've perfected it. But it takes, in my mind, a lot of time to prepare good, quality, healthy food and to have it around, and to convince your kids to eat it! I think that's really challenging to do without having a homemaker or somebody who has the time to put into it. 

I feel really fortunate that we've been able to work that out in our situation.

Then it’s also being there emotionally and having the time. Again, I feel fortunate that I have the time to devote to my kids so that things aren't quite as rushed as they would be if I had another job to get to.

EMERALD: Was your seasonal experience a help or a hindrance in moving into your current position?

BEN: My outdoor experience, my guiding experience, is helpful in everything I've done. It made me who I am today and taught me so many things about everything - more than I could even mention. And as a homemaker, dealing with people, dealing with kids, supporting people, understanding emotions… in every way I would say that guiding was helpful in what I do now.

EMERALD: I meet many employers of seasonal staff who are struggling to retain employees, particularly highly-skilled senior staff. What changes, if any, to the workplace or outdoor industry would have extended your tenure in a seasonal role?

BEN: I don't think there was anything that could have extended my tenure. I think for me, I was in an obvious transition point and ready to move out of guiding. Maybe if they were going to pay me a lot more money and the benefits were way better, maybe it would've been a harder decision to make as I was comparing other options. But for me, I think I was ready to move on. 

That being said, I don't have any specific advice for employers on how to keep these employees. I do think that it's worth the effort and consideration, of course.  I know most employers do understand this, but I've definitely dealt with employers who didn't really appreciate their experienced guides. 

After having been a guide for 12 years and having been an experienced guide and around so many really good, experienced guides… those good guides are worth a lot. What that means financially, how you keep them, I'm not sure. But it's worth the consideration because they are what make trips spectacular.

EMERALD: How did your family (defined broadly as any intimate familial, romantic, or platonic connections) interact with your seasonal work?

I’ll address my mom and my dad primarily.  I was kind of floundering as a young person. I had dropped out of college my senior year and was working full-time for my parents at their family hardware store, unsure of what I was going to do. I didn't know what guiding was, living in Pennsylvania. And this opportunity came along to go to Jackson, Wyoming and become a river guide, get trained. 

I had the opportunity thanks to my parents who did support me, although I think that was highly questionable at the time! I loaded up my truck (not knowing that I was going to live in it for the next 10 years) and took off. 

I think it was really hard for them for the first couple of years to understand what I was doing and to trust me. It took a year before they saw the joy in me. It all changed when they were able to come on trips, see what was going on, understand the job, and see its effects on people.

EMERALD: I hear often from men transitioning out of seasonal work that they are interested in being a homemaker or stay-at-home parent. However, especially in our outdoor or mountain communities, men are often still underrepresented as primary caregivers in the family. Was there any resistance - either internal or external - you moved through when starting this role?

BEN: I didn't ever really think there was external resistance but inevitably there are always those questions from people who ask what you do. For the longest time, I used the term, “stay-at-home dad”. I never loved that term and there were some awkward conversations. I feel like whether it’s changing for me, or society is changing, there are more and more stay-at-home dads or homemakers. I think I'm becoming more confident too, in who I am and what I do.

Being a dad, definitely there is something to get over there. There is also something about being a homemaker in general, whether male or female, that I sense in many of the homemakers that I know. We’re trying not to be defensive of who we are. It's hard sometimes because so many other people, both parents are working. The term stay at home parent just sort of implies that you’re not doing other things. Most of us have other small jobs on the side. That’s not to say being a homemaker isn't a full-time job. You realize that the more you do it that there are more chores than you can get done in a day! And being supportive of the working parent is really important as well.

I understand that it's extremely difficult for most people and both parents must work in order to make it work. I also think it is unfortunate that our society has moved in a direction where people are forced into that because I do think homemaking is important… I feel very fortunate to be able to do it. I wish more people could.

“There are so many skills, knowledge bases, friends, and relationships that I took with me. I shouldn't have been as afraid of leaving guiding as I was.”

EMERALD: What does “dream job” mean to you? Has this definition changed since you were 22?

BEN: I wouldn't say I've ever really known what my dream job was. But looking back, I feel like I've had my dream jobs. Like guiding, for instance. At 21 years old, I didn't even know what a river guide was. And then at 22 I'd been trained as a river guide. Then, I knew I wanted to be a river guide and I lived my dream job for the next 10 years. 

Then it was the same with caregiving and homemaking. I really never dreamed that I would do this or even have kids, let alone be their primary caregiver. But now that I'm in that position and have been living it, I would say that it is sort of my dream job.

EMERALD: If someone in outdoor seasonal work is interested in shifting out, what would you suggest they consider? Why?

BEN: Two things. I think one is that you can often ease your way out. You don't have to just leave. There seems to be the opportunity to do less and less trips. The work seems to be there, especially if you're a quality, experienced guide. For me, that made it possible for me to transition into other things and to realize that guiding isn't what I wanted to do anymore. 

Second, don't underestimate the skills that you've developed as a guide. Those skills may be hard to put on a resume for certain positions. Some people who aren't familiar with guiding might not recognize them right away. But anybody who knows a guide knows they are hard workers. Most people when they meet a guide, it's obvious that guides are achieving individuals who will work hard at something. So don't underestimate the skills you’ve acquired.

EMERALD: Imagine you’re eighty years old, retired, living your best life. In three - five sentences, describe the scene.

If I'm 80, my kids will be about the age I am now. So I hope I'm healthy and my wife is as well, and my kids are as well. And we are still outdoors, enjoying river trips and each other's company.

Ben’s Past Non-Seasonal Roles:   

• Hardware store clerk at my family’s hardware store, Walker’s Hardware - Lock Haven, PA

• Property Manager, Indian Springs Ranch - Jackson, WY

Ben’s Past Seasonal roles:

• River Guide 

  • OARS - Dinosaur, Moab, Idaho

  • Earth River - Futaluefu River, Chile

  • Regional Manager, OARS Dinosaur

• Bread Delivery Person, Missoula, MT

• Night Janitor, Jackson Hole Mountain Resort - Jackson, WY

• Carpentry 

• Dishwashing

Ben’s Education & Certifications

• Wilderness First Responder

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A 2023 Update: Read / Watch / Listen recommendations are usually available only to paid subscribers but I really need ALL of you to send me your song of the summer recommendations this month so… consider it a free sneak peak ;)

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If it’s not a good time to subscribe, liking or sharing helps too.

READ

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All my romance and escape read recs can now be found on IG: emeraldlensreads

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